Category: Thoughts

Everyone has heard the saying, or some variation regarding “on the fence” or “…side of the fence.”

This evening, I was thinking about something which happened to me. I was reminiscing about yesterday when I felt happy and sad and happy and sad – classic manic depression. I have fought this battle for years. I have a good handle on it. But this very evening, I told a good friend about it while texting at the local bar.

After our chat, I did some reading, and chatted with my friend who is the manager. I then remembered that I had to go to the washroom before I boarded the subway which brought me here. I had totally forgotten until I could forget no more.

I ran down to the washroom and while doing my thing, I thought to myself, so and so is such a good friend. I am so thankful to have a friend like her. It felt really good letting her know about my manic depressive feeling from yesterday.

I felt happy knowing that I have friends like her who I can confide in. They say it is good to talk about things which affect you. Just talking about them has an almost magical way of making things feel better.

I started to think about other friends and how I am glad that I have a friend like her who I can confide in, but that others may “be on the fence” about such topics. I then thought, it is best to speak to your friends. If you cannot speak to them because they might end up on a proverbial “fence”, then are they really your friends? How many so-called friends can lean on this imaginary fence until it collapses and no longer shields anybody from reality?

I will start this post by not lying. I will tell you all the truth and nothing but the truth so help me.

Summer has ended and I am now feeling sad. The cold weather and the fact that it will be miserable for the next 8 months has really got me down.

There are only two things that bring joy to me during the start of these dark days. The piano and my new job.

I just completed my second week at my new job and am still very excited. I’m so excited I find it difficult to sign out at the end of my shifts.

As most of you should know, I’m passionate about the piano. Learning and practicing piano has really helped me to feel better all around. I am working on my scales and spending up my left hand. I see Improvement in my sight reading and left hand speed. I’m also seeing improvement in my hands-together routine.

I am thankful to be able to work from home but fearful of the day when they ask us to return to our office…especially now that the weather is poor.

I miss my friends overseas and look forward to the day when I can see them again.